Black Body Collage

FOR SINFONIETTA (1200 0111 0101 1111)

written for the Aspen Music Festival

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Black Body Collage is a collection of personal identities, experiences, and emotional states. In my eyes, a collage is the result of forcing various distinct elements into a space that does not provide enough scale for any individual element to be fully realize. I feel like that reflects a lot of my internal struggles when navigating my relationship with inherited histories, identity intersections, and modern codifications. Often, I get confused about who I think I am and who I want to be in the eyes of others. Every time I ask myself "Who am I?", I come to a different answer depending on so many factors that exist beyond me and may only exist in that moment. At times, it even feels like others will project an identity onto me that feels inherently dissonant.

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In this piece, I am particularly interested in the ways my interpretation of my identity can change depending on the distance or time between various states. As I zoom into and zoom out of various states, I am curious how the completeness of any one state affects the perceived realness of another. Through the music, I search for a sense of agency that allows me to either accept or reject certain parts of my percieved identity and gives freedom to the person I really am.

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